March 2020

In mid-March, all American Baptist Homes of the Midwest (ABHM) communities followed direction from the Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services (CMS) and adopted a “no visitors” policy for the protection of our residents. This means that only essential staff members and healthcare personnel will be allowed into the buildings for the foreseeable future. Everyone who does enter an ABHM community will first be subject to screening questions recommended by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC).

The no visitor policy is a proactive measure taken to mitigate the risk of spreading COVID-19 within our communities. Age and underlying medical conditions are both risk factors for COVID-19, which makes our residents particularly vulnerable to this illness.

In addition to the no visitor policy, we have made the decision to only transport residents to essential medical appointments and are canceling many of our usual events and activities. Residents are encouraged to stay home and not spend time in our community rooms. Exceptions to the no visitor policy will be made for families during a major change in condition of their loved one and/or during the end-of-life process.

Practice Social Distance, Not Social Isolation

While these measures have been taken to keep people safe and healthy, social distancing does exacerbate seniors’ already elevated risk for isolation and loneliness—and the negative health impacts they can cause. During this time of social distancing, it is more important than ever to maintain regular contact with your loved ones in a senior living community.

We can’t predict when it will be safe to relax the no visitor policy. In the meantime, try these suggestions for how to stay connected with seniors while the no visitor policy remains in place:

  1. Video Calls: If your loved one has a smartphone, tablet, or computer, try setting up video calls with them. A 2015 study found that regular face-to-face social interaction significantly lowers a person’s risk for developing depression—particularly among older adults. Video calls are the next best thing to an in-person visit.Some of our communities are scheduling video chat sessions with staff on hand to help coordinate calls. If your loved one isn’t very digitally savvy, reach out to their community for assistance.
  1. Phone Calls: Of course, phone calls are always a good standby. Because we’re canceling regularly scheduled activities and encouraging residents to limit time spent in public spaces, they will be having much more limited social interaction within the community. We recommend calling to check in on them once a day during this time. Even if you are also scheduling video calls, it wouldn’t hurt to throw in a phone call on days when you don’t talk by video.
  2. Home Videos: Most of us are already recording videos of our daily life all day long to share on social media. If your loved one is on social media, that’s great—keep those videos coming! If they’re not, find a way to round up the videos you take during the day or week and share them with your loved one, whether by text or email. Seeing little snapshots of your day will mean the world to them.
  3. Follow a Schedule: Many residents of senior living communities rely on the daily activity and meal schedule for structure. Having those regularly scheduled events abruptly canceled can be very destabilizing. Consider scheduling your phone or video calls for the same time each day to give your loved one an element of routine and something they can count on looking forward to every single day.

While we will keep the no visitors policy in place as long as the CDC and CMS recommends to keep our seniors safe and healthy, we hope the day will come sooner rather than later when we can resume our usual routines in ABHM communities. Until then, make sure to stay in regular contact with your loved ones. It’s the best thing you can do for them—and for yourself.

 

 

 

 

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Three elderly men laughing and playing cards

The prospect of adding new friendships can bring a lot of joy to some folks but to others in post retirement, making new friends can be challenging. Especially if you’ve moved closer to your adult children and grandchildren. While happy about having more support from your family, leaving a circle of lifelong friends can be lonely.

Let’s face it, our closest friends know everything about us, our secrets, our stories, our families so we don’t have to tell our backstory each time we meet. This “short-hand” conversation style takes a while to create and it can be overwhelming to start all over again in a new place.

Most of us haven’t made new friends since we were in school, but research studies have repeatedly shown that having an active social life is essential to older adults’ physical and mental health.

If you or someone you know is reluctant to socialize, encourage them to start small and take their time. After all, a person’s best friend doesn’t become one overnight! Here are some helpful tips for making new friends:

1. Join in.
Take the pressure off one-on-one conversations and join a group, club, or activities where you can find others who share your interests. Religious congregations, exercise classes or your communities’ activities calendar is a great place to start.

2. Manage expectations for new friendships.
Making quality friendships takes time, so try to be patient. Show genuine interest but then give a new friendship the time and space to develop naturally.

3. Dine with a variety of people.
Meal times at a senior living community are the hub of social engagement. If it feels intimidating to walk in alone, locate a staff member who can help you locate new folks to dine with each day.

4. Keep an open mind.
Many folks are surprised by the new life they find in a senior living community. Be open to making friends with people you meet, even those who might not seem like someone you would mix with. Community life inherently offers a common ground that can be the basis for a potential friendship. Say “hi” in the hallways, greet new residents when they move in and spend some time in the common areas.

5. Make friends with the staff.
A senior living community at its best is a family. While staff members must maintain professional boundaries, these intergenerational friendships benefit everyone. Generally, the staff know everyone in the community and can help introduce you to other residents.

6. To have a friend, you have to be a friend.
Put the other person first and be a good listener, ask lots of questions, and get to know the other person. Think about how you can be helpful to the other person, and show up for them when they need you.

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